Corrupt a wish!

Granted, but your control over the elements caused a maelstrom which teared you apart in a flurry of flame and earth. I wish for a corporation to liquidate all of its assets and happily sign over all of the money to me.

Granted. The smallest grandpa-and-grandma store in town that narcissisticly labels itself a "corporation" signs over about ¥3,102. And that's before conversion fees. And transfer taxes. And the price of gas that they charged you so they could drive it over to your house. And some other pointless tax based on the distance between you and the town they were born in.

I wish for a nonlethal sense of humor.

Granted. Your non-lethal sense of humor works out for the first few months, you go to the comedy clubs and try it out, and you get a good response from the crowd, but then you are told by your comedy peers that you need to work on a new bit. You then devise a new non lethal sense of humor and go to try it out at "The Cellar" upon which you soon realize that your new bit is marred by its Jim Carrey-like jokes and you soon find that your sense of humor is outdated and by the 20th tomato thrown, you realize you have made a big mistake.


I wish for an indestructible lambourgini that comes with an indestructible driving suit.

Unfortunately it came with a very sensitive ejector seat. To bad you can't swim.....

I wish for an Uncorruptable wish that none of you can do anything about or even see.
Yea, that's right the system can't hold me down.

Granted. While none of us can do anything about it, Cthulhu laughs at your "incorruptibility."

I wish America would lose all memory of the customary units and start using the metric system.

Granted.And a serial killer use the metric system to measure and then cut you.

I wish that supernatural creatures become real.

Granted a dragon comes to your house and acts friendly. You then decide it wants to be your friend and you will go on many magical adevntures with him and meet many more supernatural creatures. You look up at the dragon but see a light behind it you think the sun but its moving, you then realise it is a pheonix it grabs the dragon and burns it alive then caws mockingly. It turns to you, somehow you think it is smiling with you but it can't since it has a beak. It then eats you alive so you can't ever experience any more encounters with the great creatures you never saw.

(That kinda got out of hand but I got bored.)

I wish that my body will always be immune to microorganisms

Granted. You have a very long day and, in attempting to get to your bed, you give out from exhaustion and faceplant on the hardwood floor. You wake up the next morning with a massive headache and multiple sore body parts from the impact. You take aspirin to relieve the pain but fail to notice that it is past its expiration. The aspirin has undergone a volatile chemical change and, unfortunately, it is not a microorganism and you are thus not immune to it.

I wish for a gun that shoots readily adhesive bumper stickers that read "I DRIVE LIKE A MONKEY THAT HAS ITS FINGER KNUCKLE-DEEP IN ITS NOSE" for usage on the cars of people who drive like monkeys that have a finger knuckle-deep up their noses. And an exclusive license to use the gun.

Granted.But the SSMTHFKDUTN (Secret Society of Monkeys That Have a Finger Knuckle-Deep Up Their Noses) kill you for expose their name.Then they eat your face and put your finger in their noses.

I wish lose 50$,then 100$,then 200$,400$......2000000.....600000000.....(corrupt that ha!!!)

You get run over. The end.


I wish for nothing.

Granted. Nothing happens, literally, nothing happens and you become so bored that you learn to regret the mistake in your wish and you begin to dream, to yearn for something more than just, well, nothing. It is then that you realize that you in fact did wish for something, you wished for nothing and everything that comes with nothing.


I wish for immense banjo skills that, when playing the banjo, all of the world, every blade of grass, every animal, every human is at peace for just one song, the song of eternity.

Granted. While everyone is at peace during the song, you eventually give out from exhaustion and everyone who hates the banjo murders you in your slumber.

I wish that proper grammar was once again an assumed skill and not an attractive trait.

Granted butnoonewasskilledenoughtouseit'

I wish for the person after me to make my wish.

Thefallylord wrote:I wish for a puppy

Granted, but only on this thread. Find it yourself.


I wish for a cow.

Granted but you only got it's skeleton. (Also I noticed the puppy when Mushy I think wanted one.)

I wish for Det to be more competent.

Granted, but the laws of competedynamics require that the competence be transferred from another entity. You try taking the competence from Apple, but that predictably does nothing. In the process you accidentally spilled your own competence on Det, however.

I wish for a grilled cheese.

Granted; you get a slice of cheese which was grilled. It melted through the grill, so someone had to scrape it off of the coals and wad it back together along with all of the coal dust before handing it to you.

I wish for a keyring that can never get lost.

Granted. One day, you almost lose the keyring but then you remember that it's in the pocket of yesterday's pants. You reach into the pocket and out comes the keyring. A wave of relief washes over you.

I hope the keys weren't too important.

I wish for a +9,+9 Final Flourish of Lagging.

Granted. It is now, however, nearly impossible to gun

I wish skolver was weak to shock.

Granted. Each piece of Skolver now has 0.5 shock vulnerability.

I wish for new episodes of Danny Phantom.

Granted but only 2 episodes came out at they were both 10 seconds long.

I wish for my very own planet that is possible for me to live on. With the conditons that allows humans to live, and there are no aliens living there or no aliens can get there. Nor can it get hit by asteriods, nor can the course around it's star hit another planet/moon/asteriod or any star. (Really tried to make this one hard to corrupt. XD)

Granted. You are now the proud owner of a planet in the Andromeda galaxy. With the hard part behind you, all that's left is to get to there.

I wish for a ring that can control the surrounding temperature and weather up to a radius of at least 50m.

(God damit how did I leave that part out. ;n;) Granted but you could not control the ring meaning it was usless...

I wish for all the bad memes to die out and never come back!!! (You know who I'm talking to and what I'm talking about.) And that no other horrible memes will come into existence.

Granted.
Alas, with ALL the memes! gone, /b/ loses its lifeblood and dies in a fire. They're then all like, RAGEQUIT, and rickroll their way over to all four corners of the internet. OVER 9000! of them alone make their way here, and all our bases are belong to them.

So yeah, thanks a lot; but hey, #YOLO#firstworldproblems

I wish the next posters wish, wishful as it is, is a good, granted wish, ideally being a wish for fish.

Granted. I wish for a fish. You deny it. You jerk. I kill you and you die.

I wish that Red would pay for his sins of meme usage.